Letters From James
by Dbeltfan1203
Summary: Sometimes, plans change. Kogan and Jarlos
1. Shipping Off

Letters From James

Summary: Sometimes, plans change. Kogan and Jarlos

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><p>I've been bored without internet... so I typed... I hope people like it! :D<p>

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><p><span>Carlos' POV<span>

We had graduated only a week before. Kendall, Logan, James, and I… we had the world out in front of us. We were finished with Big time Rush. That part of our lives was over. Ms. Knight and Katie moved out of 2J and got a different apartment to live in so Katie could continue to go to school here. So we lived on our own. We were adults, ready to hit the ground running. We were about to start our lives.

Then a phone call came.

We knew that once we turned 18, we'd have to sign a paper saying if we got called to war, we'd go. But why'd they have to call James? Why him? Out of the millions of men… why my boyfriend? Why Kendall and Logan's best friend?

On the 8th of June, all our plans… were halted. All our ideas of the future… changed.

James got the call after lunch.

"Hello?" James answered his phone. "Yes this is him… Oh really? You have? Why thank you… it's an honor." James stated. "Yes of course. Thank you. Uh huh. Good bye." He hung up the phone.

"Who was that Jay?" I asked.

"It was… a uhm… marine." He stated.

"So?" Kendall asked.

"I got drafted…" James whispered.

"As in you have to go fight… in the war?" Logan asked.

"Y… yeah…" He nodded slowly.

Tears blurred my vision and blinking just made them fall.

"You have to be joking!" I begged.

"I'm not though…" James stated and let his head fall in his hands. Quiet sobs could be heard coming from him.

"What happens now?" Kendall asked.

He looked up. "They said I'll get a letter telling me everything in a few days." He looked over to me, I was still crying, so he pulled me to him and rocked me in his arms.

I didn't want my boyfriend going and shooting at people.

"You are to pack one weeks worth of clothes and the necessary toiletries. Meet at the downtown LA memorial building on Santa Fe Avenue on July 30th. The bus will then pick you up at 2 o'clock sharp. Don't be late." James read his letter.

"So we only have a little over 2 months left with you?" I asked through my tears.

"I guess so." James sighed.

I looked up at him, and I could tell he didn't want to go. I didn't want him to go either, but he had no choice.

James called his mom and told her everything. She was so upset. But I think I was more upset. I didn't want to lose him… he was my everything.

Sadly July 30th rolled around.

James had packed the night before, so I could spend the morning with him.

"Jay?" I spoke up as we cuddled in bed.

"What baby?" He stroked my cheek.

"I'm gonna miss you…" I whimpered, a tear slid down my cheek.

"Don't cry, I'm only going to basic training for 6 months, then I'll be home for a month, then I'll be shipped off to Iraq." He told me for the 4th time.

"I know…" I paused.

"What's really on your mind?" He asked sitting up. I sat up and looked into his hazel eyes.

"I'm scared shitless that you're going to get shipped off to Iraq and freaking die!" I sobbed. "I don't want you to die… we have so much to still do together!"

"Hey... hey now… shh…" He pulled me into a hug. "I'm going to try my damn hardest to not die." He placed a hand on the back of my head as I nuzzled in between his neck and shoulder. "Then once I come home, we can get married…" He paused as I sat back and looked at him.

"Married?" I asked.

"I want to live the rest of my life with you. And I need to know that once I come home, you'll still be here waiting for me." He reached into the bedside table and pulled out a box. "This… is for you." He opened it and pulled out a silver locket. "I know it's not a ring, but… that'll come later. For now, I want you to wear this. It has our pictures in it."

I held the small locket in my hands.

"I love it… will you put in on me?" I asked.

"Sure baby." He smiled and reached around my neck to clasp the two ends together.

"Thank you Jay… I love it… and I love you." I leaned forward and kissed him.

"I love you to Los." He smiled.

Soon Kendall knocked on the door.

"It's time to leave." He told James.

James stood and gathered his backpack.

"You gonna come watch me off?" He turned to me.

"Of course." I stated.

I knew that I couldn't kiss him goodbye when the bus came. That whole 'Don't ask, Don't tell' policy. So I had to settle with hugs and whispers.

"I love you Carlos. I always will. I'll be home before you know it. Wait for me?" James whispered in my ear as he hugged me.

"I'll wait…" I whispered back. We parted and he hugged Kendall and Logan.

"Bye." James smiled to both of them.

"Bye James…" Logan sniffed.

"Bye." Kendall patted his shoulder.

We stood there for a few seconds then the bus pulled in.

And we watched as James waved to Kendall, Logan and I, then turned and boarded the bus.

Logan wrapped an arm around me. He waved out the window as the bus pulled away.

I looked around and saw the wives, girlfriends, friends, parents, and children of all the men that left. A woman to our right looked over to us.

"Was it your husband?" I asked.

"Yeah. We just got married 4 months ago." She sniffed.

"Oh I'm so sorry." Logan patted her shoulder.

"Who was that guy that was with you?" She asked.

Kendall and Logan both looked over at me.

"My best friend." I told her.

The drive was quiet on the way home. I sat in the back, fiddling with my locket.

Kendall was driving and Logan sat in the passenger seat.

"Carlos, he'll be home before you know it." Kendall spoke up.

"Yeah. He'll come home safe." Logan added.

"Ha. He has to buzz cut his hair." Kendall laughed.

That made me smile, because he would never want to cut his hair.

"Yeah, so it doesn't get caught on anything out in the wild, or else he could get caught." Kendall kept laughing.

"Oh god… he's gonna die!" I screamed out and burst into tears.

"Kendall…" Logan slapped him in the shoulder.

The rest of the way home things were silent.

We got home and it seemed that everyone had to ask if James was really gone.

"Yes he's freaking gone!" I screamed then ran and rode the elevator up to the 2nd floor.

I waited for Kendall and Logan to come up after me, since I didn't have a key.

They unlocked the door, and everything reminded me of James. His favorite mug was sitting on the counter still and he left his jacket on the kitchen table. I grabbed the jacket and went to my room. I opened the door and smelled James' cologne. That's what made me break down. I sat on the bed and hugged his pillow.

It still smelled like him. Cinnamon. I cried for a few minutes before Logan knocked on the door.

"Wanna go down to the pool?" He asked. "You need to get out of this apartment for a while…" He stated.

"Yeah I'll go." I sniffed and wiped my tears away.

We changed then walked down to the pool.

I needed to continue on with my life, even if James was away.

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><p>I know nothing of this topic, because thankfully none of my family has had to serve in the war. So pardon me if I got somethings wrong! :D<p> 


	2. All That Heartache

Letters From James

Summary: Sometimes, plans change. Kogan and Jarlos

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><p>This is becoming my favorite story... Not sure why... But this chapter is kinda long... :)<p>

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><p><span>Carlos' POV<span>

"Hey Carlos… You okay?" Kendall asked me as we ate breakfast the next morning after James left.

Well they were eating. I was just swirling my food round my plate.

"N…no." I yawned. "I got like no sleep last night. I'm not used to sleeping alone." I sighed and stood.

"Where you headed?" Logan asked as I scraped my food into the trash and placed my plate in the sink.

"For a walk." I stated and grabbed James' jacket, my keys, then left.

I pulled the jacket on as I rode the elevator down. I zipped the blue striped jacket halfway then walked out to the lobby.

"Hey Carlos." Camille walked over.

"Hey." I sighed.

"What's wrong?" She asked then paused. "Oh yeah… James left yesterday right?"

"Yeah…" I paused as my stomach growled really loud. "Oh sorry." I blushed.

"Hey, let me take you out and buy you a pink smoothie!" She grabbed my hand and dragged me down to the smoothie stand.

"But Camille…" I paused as she paid for two smoothies and thrusted one into my hand.

"Enjoy." She stated.

"Okay." I smiled slightly and sipped at my drink. "It's really yummy." I told her.

"They help. Steven broke up with me." She told me.

"Why?" I asked.

"He says that he needs a girlfriend that can spend all her time with him. And I can't since I have acting." She sighed.

"That's so dumb!" I gasped. "He's such a jerk." I hugged her. "You gonna be okay?"

"Yeah. I'll be fine. Are you doing better?" She asked.

"Yeah. I'll be okay. I nodded and drank more of my pink smoothie.

Camille seemed to help me with missing James, so we started to hang out more.

Sometimes to get smoothies and just talk, other times we'd go places.

xxxxxxxxxxxx

Soon a whole 2 weeks had passed.

"Come on Carlos… you gotta eat." Logan stated.

"I'm just not hungry… I ate a lot last night… I'll eat later." I told him as he and I sat at the table.

"Mail call." Kendall stated as he walked through the front door. "Bills, junk, junk, something for mom, junk, bills… Oh hey something for Carlos!" He tossed me the envelope.

"Who's it from?" Logan asked.

I looked down and recognized the handwriting almost immediately.

"It's from Jay!" I smiled and ripped open the letter.

Dear Carlos,

First off, I miss you so much, so much it hurts. I wish I could be home, but I can't. So you have to promise to be strong okay? So about my day, if you were curious. There are 15 men in my platoon. The first day, we sat around and introduced ourselves. There is one other gay guy here. His name is Andy. The others seemed okay with him talking about his boyfriend back home, so when it was my turn I told them all about you. Apparently some of the guys' girlfriends and wives were big fans of Big Time Rush, so they knew I was gay. Everyone seemed to bring pictures of the people they left behind, so I thumb tacked my picture of you to the bottom of the bunk above mine. Sam, the guy above me, didn't care. That was the first day, the second day, we got our army suits, and they made us all buzz cut our hair! I have short hair, and I hate it! But it's easier to wash. But I hope you like me with short hair. It's so weird. I only take like 5 minute showers now. That's gonna be interesting once I get home. But anyway, we have 3 pairs of clothes. I hate that. Training has been pretty hard. It's long, from 4 a.m. to sometime 9 or 10 at night. The first day was really hard. And don't tell Kendall and Logan, but there are times I cry myself to sleep, because I just want to come home. I miss you so much… I feel like you're suffering as much as I am. You have to be all alone to. I'll try and write a lot to. It's only been two weeks, but I just want to come home. The major said that not everyone is shipped off right after we get home from boot camp, so these 6 months should go by a little faster. Anything new happening at home? Are Kendall and Logan being nice? Give them both hugs for me. I want you to know, Carlos, I love you so much… and I can't wait to come home and hug you, and kiss you, and just not have to miss you. I love you Carlos and I can't wait to see you again. I love you.

Love, James

"Carlos… you okay?" Logan spoke up. I wiped my face and nodded.

"Is he doing okay?" Kendall asked.

"He says he misses us and that he got his hair buzzed." I slid the letter back in the envelope and noticed something else in there. "What's this?" I pulled it out and saw it was a picture of James with his new short hair.

"Oh wow!" Kendall gasped as he caught sight of the photo. "He looks so different!"

"Wow." Logan laughed. "Crazy!"

"I like it." I smiled. I grabbed my… well James' stripped jacket and my keys.

"Where you headed?" Kendall asked.

"To hang with Camille. We're going to the park." I told them as I slid my shoes on.

"You're going to hang with Camille again?" Logan asked.

"Yeah... why?" I asked.

"Just be careful. People know James is gone. I don't want people to start rumors that you are cheating." Logan stated.

"Dude. I'm gay… I'm not gonna cheat on James… especially not with a girl." I laughed. "It's fine. Bye." I hurried out the door and down to the lobby.

"Hey Camille!" I waved and ran over.

"Hey Carlos." She smiled.

"Oh hey check this out. I got a letter in the mail from James…" I pulled the photo out of my wallet. "Look it!" I smiled.

"Oh wow! He looks so different!" She giggled.

"Yeah." I smiled. "I like his hair short…" I looked at it once more then put it back in my wallet.

"So ready to go to the movies?" Camille asked.

"Yep. Oh guess what!" I laughed as we walked out to my car. "Logan said I should be careful that people don't think I'm cheating on James with you."

"What? Ha! That's funny." She laughed as we climbed into my car and drove to the movies.

xxxxxxxxxxxx

Two months after I got my letter from James, it was Kendall and Logan's anniversary.

Their 5 year… meaning it was 4 days away from being mine and James' 6 year. And I couldn't spend it with him.

I woke up and could hear them having shower sex.

I sighed. "It's only 9 am…" I rolled my eyes and got up. I grabbed a sticky note, wrote going to the pool on it, and stuck it to the fridge.

That's what we started to do once Mama Knight moved out. So we knew where each other was.

I walked down to the pool and smiled when I saw Camille going over her lines.

"Heya." I waved.

"Well you're up early." She smiled and set her script down.

"Yeah. Kendall and Logan woke me up…" I groaned.

"How?" She asked.

"Shower sex… It's their 5 year today." I sighed.

"Oh. Isn't yours coming up soon?" She asked.

"Yeah. Mine and James' 6 year is this Friday." I told her.

"And you can't spend it together… aw I'm sorry!" She gasped and hugged me.

"It's fine…" I told her and she pulled away.

"Then why are you crying?" She asked and wiped tears away.

I rubbed my eyes. I didn't even know I was crying.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to." I sighed. "I just miss him… and he said he'd write a lot… but it's been two months."

"Well I'm sure he's really busy." She told me.

We sat and talked for a while. I looked at my watch and saw it was already 2.

"Yeah…" I stood. "Well thanks for the talk. I'm gonna go for a jog." She waved and I walked up to the apartment to change into my jogging shoes.

I jiggled the handle and it was locked. I shrugged and guessed that I had locked it when I left.

I unlocked it and opened the door only to see Kendall and Logan having sex on the kitchen table.

"God what the hell! We eat there!" I screamed.

"Ah! Carlos!" Logan screamed and pushed off of Kendall.

"No need to stop… I'm just changing my shoes." I huffed and grabbed my jogging shoes, which were thankfully next to the door and left with out even taking off my old ones. I stood in the hall and swapped the shoes.

"Well lets hope that no one steals them." I said to myself as I set my shoes neatly outside of the door, then headed to the stairs.

I jogged down the two flights of stairs then through the lobby to a path that ran through a patch of woods on the edge of town. By now it was the middle of October and the trees were already turning colors.

I arrived at the path and smiled. The small dirt path was lined with tall trees that seemed to meet over head and block out the sky. As I jogged I couldn't help but be mesmerized by the trees. They were all yellow and the prettiest thing I had ever seen.

Fall has always been my favorite season, not just because James asked me out under a red tree that used to be in my back yard, but the fact that it was so nice out. The perfect kind of weather.

I started getting dark so I decided to head home. Praying that Kendall and Logan were done for the night.

I walked up to the apartment and saw my shoes still sitting there.

"Well good thing they weren't stolen." I grabbed them and slowly opened the door.

I was about to call out and see if anyone was home when Logan ran out into the living room, naked, with Kendall chasing after him.

"I'm gonna fuck you so hard!" Kendall yelled, neither of them realizing I was home.

"Do it then!" Logan laughed.

"YOU BOTH NEED TO STOP!" I screamed.

"Carlos!" They both gasped.

"When did you get home?" Kendall asked and grabbed a blanket off the couch to cover Logan and himself.

"Just now…" I said dully and stomped to my room.

"What's your problem?" Kendall yelled.

"Kendall stop." Logan whispered.

"My problem!" I turned to face him. "What's yours? You just get to fuck everywhere in the house?" I screamed.

"It's our 5 year! We can do that! Why don't you just go fuck James!" Kendall screamed at me then stopped and gasped.

"I…" I paused, still shocked from his words.

"Carlos…" Logan spoke up. I felt tears form.

"I CAN'T! YOU SON OF A BITCH!" I yelled through my tears. "BECAUSE HE'S IN THE FUCKING WAR!" I screamed and ran into my room, slamming the door.

"Kendall what's wrong with you?" I heard Logan scream as I stood in my empty room. I was already crying from Kendall's words, but seeing James' bed empty still hurt. I sat on my bed and sobbed into my hands.

I looked up when I heard knocking.

"Carlos… Carlos open up…" Kendall spoke through the door. "I'm sorry… I didn't mean it… I was just mad… I forgot… please open the door." He begged.

"Get the fuck away!" I yelled and threw my shoe at the door.

"Just leave him be." I heard Logan say, then a pair of footsteps leaving.

xxxxxxxxxxxx

I stayed in my room and away from Kendall for a few days. Logan brought me food, but I kept to myself.

"Hey Carlos? It's Friday, Kendall and I are going to a movie… Wanna go?" Logan asked through the door.

"No." I stated.

"Okay. Please eat something while we are gone." He begged, then a few moments later I heard the door close.

I stood and dressed into my favorite pair of jeans, that James told me my ass looked great in, my favorite shirt, one James gave me, his stripped jacket, and my jogging shoes. I grabbed my phone and keys before finally leaving my room for the week. I locked the door and left, knowing that jogging to my favorite place would make me feel better.

It took about 10 minutes to get there and I was glad to see it still looked as it did earlier that week, and that there weren't any people around.

I walked around for a half hour before stopping to sit on a log. My phone started to ring. I glanced at it and didn't recognize the number.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Carlos!" I gasped at the familiar voice.

"Jay!" I smiled.

"Happy anniversary!" He said happily.

"Happy anniversary Jay." I sniffed as a few tears fell. "You remembered…"

"Well yeah… it's our 6th year… I had to memorize it sometime." He chuckled and tears sprung to my eyes.

"I miss you…" I cried.

"Hey… shh… I'm sorry… I keep meaning to write… but we're so busy! And I want to write you before I go to bed… but once I hit my bed at the end of the day, I pass out. I had to beg for this phone call." He told me.

"I'm glad you called… my week has been hell." I told him.

"How?" He asked.

"Well Kendall and Logan's anniversary… and they were literally fucking everywhere. And when I yelled at them, Kendall yelled at me and told me if I had a problem I could just go fuck you…"

"Oh no…" James paused.

"I'm not talking to him right now. He hurt me…" I paused.

"Carlos… you know he didn't mean it… Baby… please be friends with Kendall again." James asked.

"But Jay… I miss you… and him reminding me that I can't have you right now… I hate this!" I cried.

"Baby… hey… hunni… stop crying. Please?" James asked.

"Okay…" I sniffed.

"And relax. We'll be together soon. Okay? Just try and work through it." James told me.

"But what if I can't?" I asked, starting to cry again.

"You can. You're my strong papi. I know you can do anything." James paused. "I have to go now."

"Oh… okay." I paused. "Tú eres el amor de mi vida."* I whispered.

"Te quiero mi papi, mantente fuerte mi amor."* He told me with a chuckle.

"Bye Jay."

"Bye Carlos." He said, then the phone line went dead.

"I finally get to talk to him… and then he had to go… we barely got to talk…" I whispered and pulled my knees to my chest and cried.

Soon it was dark and I was getting kinda cold.

"Carlos…" I felt someone touch my shoulder. I looked up and was met with blonde hair and green eyes. "I'm so sorry…" Kendall whispered, his voice choking from the tears that were falling.

"Kendall…" I whimpered and reached up, pulling him down in a hug. He fell to his knees and held on to me.

"I'm so so sorry… I didn't mean anything I said." He told me.

"I know. I forgive you." I smiled and kissed his temple. He was my best friend. I needed him to be here for me.

And he was.

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><p>I'm actually proud of this chapter... stay tuned for more to come!<p>

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><p>*You are the love of my life.<p>

*I love you my papi, stay strong my love.


	3. Loneliness

Letters From James

Summary: Sometimes, plans change. Kogan and Jarlos

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><p>I saw that people liked the post on tumblr for this fic. So I figured why not post the next chapter! :D<p>

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><p>Carlos' POV<p>

"What do you mean?" I opened an eye and heard Kendall yell from the front room.

I hurried to jump outta bed and out to see what was going on.

"What's wrong?" I asked. I looked up and saw Logan, dressed and carrying a suitcase. "Logan, where are you going?" I asked, severely worried he was leaving Kendall.

"Oh. I'm just leaving for a month. My aunt needs me to help take care of my cousins while my uncle is in surgery and recovery." Logan told me.

"Oh." I nodded. "So why are you freaking out?" I asked the blonde.

"Because I…" His eyes went big and then he shut his mouth.

"What?" I asked.

"It's nothing." Kendall mumbled.

"Just tell me." I gripped his forearm.

"I just," He sighed. "I was gonna say that he'll be gone for a month, and that's a long time…" Kendall hung his head. "But then I remembered how brave you're being."

I felt tears spring to my eyes. Ever since Kendall said that comment about James, he has been really careful about what he says.

"Kendall, you can miss Logan. I understand. Never having to be apart from that person, then them having to leave, it sucks. You can miss him." I told him.

"Will you be okay?" Logan asked Kendall.

Kendall looked down to Logan and nodded slowly.

"Y-yeah." He stated then pulled Logan into a hug.

"I'll be home soon." Logan kissed his nose then his lips. "Love you."

"Love you to Loges." Kendall smiled and released his hold on Logan.

"Bye Carlos."

"Bye Logan." I waved then Logan left.

Kendall sniffed, then retreated back to his bedroom. I sighed sadly and sat on the couch, I could hear his soft cries.

He stayed in his room all day.

"Ken, I made you dinner." I balanced a tray, of a pb&j and a glass of milk, in one hand while I knocked with the other.

"Come in." Kendall stated quietly. I walked in and he was lying on his side, facing the wall. I set it on his bedside table and sat on the edge of his bed.

His shoulders were shaking a bit and I knew it was gonna be hard for him. I ran a hand through his hair and hushed him softly.

"How long has he been gone?" Kendall asked me.

"Who?" I asked.

"James."

"Oh." I paused to think. "It's been almost 5 months." I told him.

Kendall sat up and faced me. "How have you handled this!" Kendall asked. "Logan hasn't even been gone a whole day and I feel empty." He sighed.

"The first day is always the hardest." I told him. "Eat, I'm gonna head to bed. Okay?" I stood.

I left and went to my room down the hall.

No matter how long it has been, still seeing James' empty bed makes me sad. I walked over to my bedside table and grabbed the newest letter that came. I got it today, but hadn't had a chance to open it yet.

Dear Carlitos-

How are you babe? A little over one more month till I'm home and you're in my arms. I've been training my ass off. I wish I were home. But I'm marking off the days till I get to come home. My friend Andy, he thinks you're cute! I told him that you're always mine though. I knew he was just joking, but it still made me jealous. And my bunk mate, Sam, he thinks you are goofy, I tell him about you. Some of the other guys tease me when I get new letters from you, saying I get this thousand watt smile, that doesn't go away for a whole hour. I guess just hearing from you makes me smile. Well sorry this letter is short. I don't have a whole lot of time. Well I love you baby. Tell Kendall and Logan I say hi.

Love, James

I smiled and folded the note back up and slid it in the envelope. I reached in and pulled out the newest picture. It was of him and two others. I flipped it over and it read: Sam, James, and Andy. James looked happy with his friends. I was so glad he was coming home soon. I smiled and put in the drawer before sliding into bed and turning of the lights.

I lay on my side and fiddled with the locket that still hung from my neck. I wore it almost 24/7. Except when I showered and swam.

I faintly heard a door open then a moment later a soft knock on my door.

"Carlos?" Kendall's voice called out.

"Huh?" I sat up and flipped on my light. The door opened and Kendall stood there, eyes red from crying.

I watched as the blonde shuffled towards me, clad in a tank top and blue boxers.

"C-can… Can I sleep with you?" Kendall asked.

"Uhm, y-yeah sure." I nodded and scooted over. "You okay?"

"Yeah." Kendall nodded as he slid in next to me. "I'm just lonely. And I can't sleep."

"Oh." I smiled at him. "It gets better." I told him and pulled the blanket over him. "Sleep well." I lay back down, facing away from him.

I felt myself drifting off to sleep when Kendall's voice spoke up again.

"Hey Los?"

"What?" I asked.

"Uhm. Well… oh never mind." He sighed.

I rolled over to face him. "What is it?" I asked again.

"J-just don't blame me if you wake up with me cuddling against you." Kendall mumbled.

"It's okay." I laughed slightly and scooted closer to him. "We're just friends. I understand, you're used to being close to someone at night." I snuggled in close to his chest. He smiled and wrapped his arms around my shoulder and waist.

"Thanks. Night Carlos." He said, face against my hair.

"Night. Love ya Kendall."

"Love ya to." I heard his say before I drifted off to sleep.

I felt myself wake, but I still kept my eyes closed. My ears picked up the sound of soft steps. I figured it was Kendall so I ignored them. But then my senses registered as I heard the soft click of a lock and then I realized that Kendall was still next to me, our arms securely around each other.

I heard soft talking then got really worried. I opened my eyes and noticed the bedroom door was cracked.

I sat up quickly and Kendall groaned.

"Los?" The blonde

"Shh... I think someone is in the apartment..." I whispered.

Kendall automatically sat up, eyes wide and not tired anymore. I tiptoed to the door. One wrong step caused the floor to creak. I heard the front door shut quickly and I rushed out of the room.

I looked around and didn't see anything that looked out of place or taken.

"Did you see who it was?" Kendall asked, running out behind me.

"No. But nothing looks moved or taken..." I stated, scratching my head.

"Weird." Kendall yawns and we go back to my room. "Well I'm gonna go pick up the mail." He states pulling on a pair of sweats.

"Okay. I'll stay here." I tell him and pull on a pair of jeans.

"Be careful. Lets hope those guys don't come back." Kendall pauses.

"I'll be fine Ken. It was probably just Bitters or something." I state.

"Okay." Kendall shrugs and leaves. I went out to the kitchen and started to fix a sandwich.

I sat down and flipped through tv channels for a good half hour when my phone went off.

"Hello?"

"Hey, I need you to come down to the lobby. Katie says she needs to talk to us."

"Okay?" I shrugged and hung up then made my way down to the lobby.

"Hey." Kendall waved and I walked over to them. "So Katie, tell us when you are thinking."

"Kendall I can't believe you! Carlos you either!" Katie shouted.

"No yelling!" Bitters screeched.

"What are you talking about Katie?" I asked.

"I saw you two!" She huffed.

"You were the one in our apartment? Why?"

"Mom wanted to know if you wanted to go to lunch today. But when I checked you room, you weren't there." She told Kendall. "So I went to find you Carlos, and what do I see! You two cheating on James and Logan!"

"What?" I screamed. "No we're not!"

"You two were sleeping in the same bed! I saw!" She stated.

I looked over to Kendall and his face fell.

"Carlos and I weren't cheating... I-I was l-lonely last night, because Logan had to go to Minnesota for the month, and so I slept in Carlos' bed because I couldn't sleep." Kendall mumbled.

"Oh... bro, I'm sorry." Katie's eyes went wide. "Sorry Carlos."

"It's okay. I'd never cheat on James. I love him to much." I smiled.

"And I love Logan. You never have to worry baby sis." Kendall hugged the girl.

"I'm not a baby!" She laughed.

"You will always to me." He smiled.

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><p>Is everyone liking this fic? I sure hope so!<p>

I promise James will be home in the next chapter.

Review and tell me what you thought!


	4. Back to Normal?

Letters From James

Summary: Sometimes, plans change. Kogan and Jarlos

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><p>I saw that people really liked this story, so I decided to update! :D<p>

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><p>Carlos' POV<p>

I woke up against Kendall's chest. It was the last day that Logan would be gone. And I was glad. Because that also meant that the final month of James being gone was over. I had to go tomorrow with Kendall and Logan to the place where we originally parted back in July.

"The downtown LA memorial building on Santa Fe Avenue." I muttered to myself.

"Ready to see James?" Kendall spoke up.

I looked up and nodded. "I miss him. I'm ready to see him."

"Logan comes home tonight!" Kendall climbed out of bed and pulled on his sweat pants.

"I know. Then you won't have to sleep in my bed anymore." I stood and stretched.

"Aw. You know I love sleeping in my Carlitos' bed!" Kendall smiled and hugged me.

"Yeah yeah, you want pancakes?" I asked.

"Please!" Kendall nodded.

We ate breakfast and then went for a jog.

"Hey Camille." I jogged past her.

"Hey Carlos. You excited for tomorrow?" She asked.

"More than you know." I smiled. "Well I should get home. We have to clean a bit before Logan gets home.

"Okay. Have fun."

"But Carlos... I don't wanna clean." Kendall whined as we made our way back to the apartment.

"Well we have to! It's hella messy in there! And that'll send Logan into a frenzy." I told him.

"Ugh fine. But you have to clean the bathroom." Kendall laughed.

"WHAT! Ew NO!" I grimaced. "The bathroom is gross!"

"Not my fault!" Kendall stated as we got into the elevator.

"Yes it is! You don't lift the lid!" I groaned.

"I do to... sometimes." Kendall huffed.

"You're cleaning the bathroom now! I'll clean the kitchen, you clean the bedrooms, and I'll clean the living room." I offered.

"Deal." Kendall nodded as I unlocked the door to 2J.

"Wow you really destroyed the place." Logan laughed.

"LOGAN!" Kendall gasped and instantly rushed to the brunette.

"Hey Ken." Logan smiled.

I watched as Kendall kissed Logan over and over.

"Kendall... you're gonna squeeze the life outta me!" Logan laughed.

"Sorry. I just really missed you." Kendall smiled and placed another kiss on his temple.

"How was it being with Kendall?" Logan asked me then pulled me into a hug.

"It was nice. He likes to cuddle though." I chuckled.

"You guys cuddled?" Logan asked, raising an eyebrow to Kendall.

"I uh. I got lonely once you were gone, so I asked Carlos if we could sleep together at night." Kendall blushed.

"Aw. You are to cute." Logan teased.

"You're so mean!" Kendall laughed.

"James comes home tomorrow, right?" Logan asked.

"Yep!" I smiled. "I can't wait."

We spent the entire afternoon cleaning up the apartment. I started on the living room then went to my room to pick up.

I gathered all the dirty laundry and got down to look under the beds.

"What's this?" I asked myself as I grabbed a random shirt from under James' bed.

It was just one of his shirts, but I smiled when it smelled like him.

"You okay?" Logan asked from the doorway.

"I'm just ready to have him home." I sighed and placed the shirt in the hamper.

"I know. He may be your boyfriend, but I do miss him to. Like Kendall is your go to person, James was... is mine. And there were times I needed him. He understood." Logan paused. "Not that you wouldn't, I just go to him for everything. So I'll be glad when he's home." Logan smiled.

"I'm glad he's to you what Kendall is to me. If that makes sense." I laughed and plopped on my bed. "I can't believe it's been 6 whole months."

"Yeah, and once he comes home, he'll hopefully be home for good." Kendall added.

"Hey Ken." Logan smiled and wrapped his arms around Kendall's waist.

"You two are so cute... it's gross." I chuckled.

"Oh and you and James aren't?" Kendall scoffed.

"Yeah, he's the one who is going to propose!" Logan laughed.

"Wait what?" Kendall and I both gasped.

"I mean, what? I said nothing!" Logan stated then hit his forehead.

"It's okay." I smiled. "James brought it up, the morning he left. Said he bought this," I held my locket in the hand. "As a promise."

"That's sweet." Kendall smiled.

We finished cleaning then sat around chatting till dinner.

"I don't wanna cook, wanna order Chinese?" I asked.

"Yes!" Kendall nodded.

"I'm cool with that." Logan nodded.

So we ordered food and turned on a movie. Then by 10 I was ready for bed.

"I'm gonna hit the hay." I yawned and stood.

"So early?" Kendall asked.

"Yeah, the sooner I go to sleep, the sooner the morning comes." I stated. "I'll sleep with ear plugs in." I added.

"Okay." Logan laughed.

As I made it to my room I could already hear Kendall's low chuckles as he was most likely climbing over Logan.

I shook my head in silent laughter as I shut my door and sat on my bed.

I was so excited for tomorrow. But I was also scared. Was James really different?

'He'll always love you.' My brain told me. I smiled and opened the locket once more before I crawled under the covers and let sleep take over.

I woke from my sleep, and it was still dark. I glanced at my clock that read 3:47 am. I sat up and took out my ear plugs, then went to pee. As I neared Kendall and Logan's bed room, I could hear quiet talking. I was honestly not shocked that they were still up.

I hated that in the back of my mind there was still this lingering worry that James might have somehow changed in the 6 months he was gone.

I shrugged it away and finished before walking back.

"You okay?" Kendall opened the door as I walked past.

"Yeah I'm okay," I smiled. "I had to pee." I laughed.

"Oh. Well sleep well." Kendall told me.

I started to walk off, "Fuck well." I stated.

"Dude!" Logan gasped out. Kendall and I just laughed.

I got back to my bed and snuggled down and just begged for 12 pm to come quickly.

I groaned as I felt something poking at my cheek.

"Carlitos! Wake up! It's 10 o'clock!" I heard Kendall yell.

"Dear god!" I sat up quickly. "I HAVE TO SHOWER!" I screeched and hurried to the bathroom.

I quickly showered then shaved my face and styled my hair.

"Kendall! Help me find something to wear!" I yelled as I rushed from the bathroom to my room. After a few moments of no answer I got frustrated. "KENDALL! Get off Logans' dick long enough to help me!" I yelled."

I heard laughter and then Kendall opened his bedroom door.

"How do you know who was topping?" He asked.

"Because you weren't limping when I got up, and you are now." I smirked.

"You're so dumb." Kendall mumbled. "So what do you wanna wear?" He asked as I searched through my closet.

"Maybe these jeans?" I grabbed my favorite pair.

"No wear these." Kendall tossed me a pair of my rip away pants.

"Okay." I shrugged. "And this shirt?" It was one of James' that he had given me once it was to snug on him. It was big on my still but I didn't care.

"That's fine. And this jacket." Kendall tossed James' purple stripped jacket at the pile.

"Okay! Thanks! Have fun getting fucked." I added as he left. He responded by slamming my door.

I dressed and soon it was 11:30.

"GUYS! We gotta go!" I yelled, grabbing the car keys.

We drove to the building and hurried to get out and wait. There was already dozens of people there.

A few people recognized us as we stood and waited. Right at 12:00 the buses pulled in.

I felt my heart start to race as the first people started to climb off.

A red headed guy got off and I recognized him from the pictures. Then James got off.

His hair had grown a bit longer, but it was still really short. I felt Kendall nudge me closer as Logan waved him over.

"JAMES!" Kendall hollered.

James looked over to us almost instantly and we locked gazes.

I took off in a full on sprint to him as he held his arms open to me.

"Carlos!" He smiled and I felt tears fall as I was held close.

"I m-missed you so s-so much!" I sobbed.

One hand moved to the back of my head as I sobbed against his shoulder. "I missed you to baby." I felt the top of my head getting damp.

"Jay." I smiled and placed my forehead against his.

"Yano Los, my friends are all cool with me being gay." James smiled, and I quickly pushed my lips to his.

I missed that feeling. I moved a hand to weave through his hair, that was now gone.

"I'm gonna miss your hair." I stated with a chuckle.

"No more crying... I'm home." James wiped my cheeks dry.

"I never want you to leave." I whispered.

"I'm hoping I won't have to." He smiled and kissed me again before we joined Kendall and Logan.

"Hey James!" Kendall hugged him, then Logan did.

"Hey James, swap digits?" A blonde walked over.

"Oh hey Sam. Yeah totally." James smiled. "Guys, this was my bunk mate, Sam. Sam, this is Kendall, Logan, and..."

"That's Carlos. I know." Sam cut him off. "Carlos, hold him tight, he talked about you every day practically."

"Aw." I smiled as James typed in his number into Sams' phone.

"We swapping numbers?" A red head walked over.

"Totally." James smiled. "Guys this is Andy. Andy meet Kendall, Logan, and."

"Carlos?" Andy asked me.

"Yep." I smiled. "It's nice to finally meet you."

"Same. I had to meet the famous Carlos Garcia. The man James couldn't shut up about."

Kendall and Logan laughed as I hugged James' arm.

We all chatted for a second before we walked back to the car.

"So should we go stay at moms for the week?" Kendall asked me as James and I cuddled in the back seat.

"Yes." James stated, not even looking away from me. "I'm having a heard time not doing him in the back seat right now."

"I know..." I groaned.

"Stop." Logan laughed.

"Well hurry home!" I laughed.

"So how was the 6 months?" James asked.

"Good. I was lonely, but then Logan had to leave for a month, and Kendall cuddled with me at night, so I wasn't to lonely. And Camille and I started to hang more." I told him.

"Ooh fun." James smiled. "Wait you and Kendall cuddled!"

"It was weird when they told me to." Logan told him.

"I'm just glad you're home." I told him again.

"Me to baby. Me to." James smiled and pulled me into a kiss.

"Hey. Hey! Keep your pants on! Shit." Logan stated, looking in the rear view mirror. James had unbuttoned 4 buttons on the left leg of my pants and had his hand up against my dick, palming it.

"Ngh, Jay..." I moaned and pushed my hips up.

"STOP! I'm trying to drive!" Logan screeched.

"Chill dude. Relieving some of the pressure." James laughed.

"Still!" He rolled his eyes.

"Oh calm down. You've touched my dick while they were driving. Chill they're fine." Kendall laughed.

I just let my head fall against James' shoulder as he gripped at my dick.

"Jay..." I gasped as he moved his hand up and down slightly.

"Okay we're home!" Logan huffed. James quickly removed his hand and I buttoned my pants back before we got out.

"Eh it's not to noticeable, because these pants are baggy." I smiled.

We walked through the lobby and a few were excited that James was home.

"James!" Camille ran over.

"Hey! I heard you kept Carlos company while I was gone. Thanks." James hugged her.

"No prob." She smiled.

"Well let Logan and I get stuff from our rooms then we'll leave." Kendall told us. I huffed and stood with James out in the living room as we waited for them to gather things.

"Okay bye!" Kendall grabbed Logan's hand as James shoved them out the door. Once the door was shut and locked James turned to me.

"Come to Papi." I smirked. James rushed over and kissed me roughly, pushing me up to sit on the back of the couch. "Mmm..." He grinded against me. "Papi like." I moaned.

James chuckled, dropped to his knees and pulled the snap buttons apart one by one on my left leg.

I ran my hands over his short hair as he kissed up my thigh.

"I m-missed you." I stuttered as he did the same to the other leg them ripped them the rest of the way off.

"So big..." James groaned as he kissed at my now prominent erection, bulging through my boxers.

"Fuck me..." I begged as I pulled my shirt and jacket off.

"Sure thing mi papi." James smirked as he pulled of his own shirt. I kissed at his chest as he touched my throbbing cock.

"Mmmm... Jay... pants off." I stated.

James smiled and pushed his pants and boxers down together. His dick sprung free and my mouth started to water.

"Bed room... now." James stated. I shimmied out of my boxers before James lifted me and carried me to our room.

"You're so strong." I moaned into his ear. It was true. He had gained more muscles in the months he was gone. His abs were more defined and his arms were sturdy. He laid me on my back and reached into the bed side table draw, retrieving our stash of condoms and lube.

"F-fuck me." I whimpered as James squeezed lube onto 3 of his fingers.

"Fingers first." He smiled and kissed me as his now slick finger teased me.

"Ngh, Jay!" I moaned as the first one entered me. It felt so awkward since I hadn't had sex in half a year, but soon I adjusted and the second one was added. Then the third. I moaned as Jay moved them around them.

"Hurry?" I asked.

"I wanna make sure you're stretched enough. It's been a while." He smiled and latched his lips onto my neck. I pushed against the digits as he thrusted them in and out.

"Now?" I pleaded.

"Hold on silly." James laughed as pulled his fingers out an slid the condom on then put more lube on. "Ready?" James asked.

"So ready." I nodded and he pushed the head in slowly. "Owwie." I whimpered.

"See I told you." Jay sighed. "Hold on, it's get better." He stated as he slowly pushed in more. It felt so awful, as I gripped onto James' shoulders. Once he was fully in he waiting till I finally nodded.

"Okay." I smiled and kissed him.

James took no time to pull out and push in.

"OH GOD!" I moaned. "Jay I missed this."

"You're so tight Los... oh sweet jesus..." James pressed his forehead to mine as he thrusted in and out of me.

I gripped at James' shoulders and let my head fall back against the pillow as he pounded in me.

"J-Jay." I thrusted up against him.

"Carlos!" James gasped and latched onto my neck.

"Jay touch me." I begged. I was getting close and they way he was moving, I could tell he was to.

James reached between us and jerked me.

"Carlos I'm c-close!" James warned me.

"Me to." I gasped and James quickened his hand. "J-Jay!" I cried out as I came across my stomach and James' hand.

I gasped in pain as James bit down on my shoulder as he came.

His hips thrusted against mine a few more times before our orgasms ended and he pulled out.

We collapsed on the bed next to each other.

"Owwie." I winced when I felt the mark on my left shoulder.

"Sorry Los." James frowned and kissed the area around the mark. "Wow... that's gonna leave a big bruise."

I smiled and took his face in my hands.

"It's okay. Because this mark will show that I'm all yours." I kissed him.

The weekend passed and we went back to normal. How life was before James got that letter.

"Where are we going?" I asked as James pulled me through the lobby and out to the pool area.

"I have to ask you a question." Jay told me.

"And you couldn't ask me in the apartment?" I huffed.

"No. I wanted all our friends here." James paused. "Attention all! Can you all be quiet for one moment please?" All our friends became silent. "Carlos Roberto Garcia, I love you so much. You're my other half. And I..." James laughed. "I just love you. I want to be with you forever."

"Jay..." I had a feeling I knew what was happening, but it didn't hit until he knelt down in front of me.

"Los, will you marry me?" James asked and held out a ring.

I felt tears spring to my eyes. "Yes! Of course!" I smiled.

James smiled so big as he slid the ring on my finger then hugged me tight.

Kendall and Logan ran over and hugged us both.

Over the next few months we planned the wedding. With help from Mrs. Diamond and my parents. James was letting his hair grow out more as the months past.

"So are you worried that James will ever get deployed?" Camille asked as we sat and sipped our drinks for our weekly get together.

"Nah. I mean, I was at first. But once that first month passed, I forgot about it." I stated.

"Gosh that sure is a pretty ring." She smiled and grabbed my hand. "How many more months till the wedding?" She asked.

"2 more." I smiled. "I'm so excited. We are all flying to New York for the wedding. Gustavo is paying. It was his treat. And then we'll have our party there." I paused as my phone rang. "Oh hold on." I saw it was Kendall. "Hello?"

"Hey. Carlos... you might want to get home." Kendall told me.

"Why? What's wrong?" I asked, slightly worried.

"It's James." Kendall stated.

"O-Okay. I'll be right there." I stood.

"What's wrong?" Camille asked.

"It's James, I think he might be sick. Kendall seemed really upset." I grabbed my jacket and left.

Once I had gotten back to the Palm Woods I hurried to 2J.

I opened the door, Kendall and Logan were standing in the living room.

"What's wrong guys? Is James sick?" I asked. Logan looked up, and instantly broke into sobs. Kendall pulled Logan to him and shook his head.

"He isn't dead is he?" I gasped.

"Just... he's in your room." Kendall told me.

I rushed to our room and shoved the door open.

I felt my heart hurt as I saw James sitting on the floor, slumped against our bed, a piece of paper in his limp hand as the other covered his face as he sobbed.

"Jay... what's wrong?" I asked. He looked up at me, eyes red, and sobbed even harder. "Jay?"

He held the paper up to me and I took it in my hands.

I read the paper once, then again. The only words that I managed to understand were; **James Diamond**,** deployed**,and** immediately**.

I felt my throat squeeze shut as I fell to my knees.

"I-I am so s-sorry Carlos..." James whispered.

I sat and sobbed as everything came crashing down. After a minute, James crawled over and pulled me into a hug.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He kept telling me over and over.

Finally after a while I was all cried out and just snuggled against James, as he kept a death grip on me.

"Guys?" Kendall walked in.

I stood and helped James up.

"Why don't you two just go to Vegas this weekend and get married there?" Logan asked.

"That sounds like a great plan!" Kendall agreed.

"No." I muttered.

"What?" James asked. "Don't you want to marry me?"

"I want to marry you more than anything in the world. But not in Vegas. I want our families there. In a church." I paused and wiped my eyes. "I'll wait."

"But what if..." James paused and looked to the ground.

I lifted his chin. "I'll wait forever if I have to." I told him.

"Okay." James nodded.

The letter said he had to leave on that Friday, the 23rd of May. The drive was silent as I my thoughts collected in my brain. James left in July of last year, he was only 18. He missed my birthday, Kendall's birthday, Logan's birthday... and he was going to miss our 19th birthdays. Even his own. I got 4 months with him. That seemed hardly fair.

"I'll miss you." I whispered as we waited at the airport for James' plane to New York to be called.

"I'll write you every day that I can." James pulled me into a hug. "I love you Carlos."

"I love you to." I sniffed.

We parted when his plane was called.

Kendall and Logan said their goodbyes. I watched as James picked up his bags.

I opened my mouth, only to let out a rather loud sob.

"Los..." James sniffed. I latched onto him once more and held tight.

"I love you." James said and kissed me.

"I lvoe you to." I whimpered once the kiss was over.

James let go and turned to head towards his tunnel.

I watched as he walked away again. And all I could do was cling to Kendall's arm to keep from sobbing. He had to leave, and I knew I would have to play this waiting game again. I knew the wait would be hard. But he would be home eventually. And then we'd have the wedding we both dreamed of.

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><p>Aw... I'm so mean... ;_;<p>

There will probably only be one more chapter.

So stay on the lookout!


	5. Birthday

Letters From James

Summary: Sometimes, plans change. Kogan and Jarlos

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><p>I can't believe that it is the last chapter. :3 I hope everyone likes it.<p>

Sorry it's kinda short.

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><p>Carlos' POV<p>

I woke up and sighed.

It was my 21st birthday today. I yawned and sat up, stretching my sleepy limbs.

I rolled over onto my side and ran my thumb over the picture frame on my bed side table. It was the most recent picture of James.

He was still the same smiley guy. But I could tell that this was putting him through some hard stress. It was stressing me out to. I hated not knowing what was going on. His letters kept me up to date. But I only got those every week or two. I knew he was still safe. I sighed and rolled onto my back and fiddled with my ring. I missed him so much. It was just past 4 years of him being gone. Some days I wouldn't think about it so much. But nights were hard.

Suddenly my door burst open and Kendall and Logan ran in.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" They both smiled. Hand in the air and party hats on.

"Thanks guys." I chuckled. Logan jumped over to me and slid a party hat on my head.

"We're going to take you shopping, and we'll buy you whatever you want!" Kendall told me.

"Anything?" I asked.

"Well there is a one thousand dollar limit. We couldn't decide what to get you, so we thought this would work." Logan smiled.

"So what do you want to do first?" Kendall asked.

"Eat." I laughed as my stomach growled.

We went to a local breakfast diner and then we left to go shopping.

"Do I really have to wear the hat?" I asked as we parked.

"YES!" Kendall and Logan both stated.

I huffed and left the hat on as we walked through the shopping center.

We probably entered about 10 different stores. They literally bought me anything I wanted. But I still was sad.

"Carlos we've gotten everything you want… why aren't you happy?" Kendall asked.

"I really only want one thing." I sighed.

"What is it? I'm sure we can afford it." Logan stated.

"James…" I looked up to my two friends, my eyes filling with tears. "I want my fiancé back." I frowned.

Kendall frowned. "We can't afford that Carlos."

"I know that you miss him…" Logan hugged me.

We finished shopping and went back to the apartment.

"Well we have reservations at 6:30." Kendall told me. "So get showered and dressed."

"I don't want to go to dinner. I just wanna spend the rest of my birthday in my room." I told them.

"No. You're going!" Logan stated.

I sighed.

"Oh fine. I'm gonna go shower." I told them.

I retreated to the bathroom and turned on the water to the right temperature as I undressed.

I sighed as I looked at my left shoulder. I smiled to myself as I ran a finger over the barely noticeable scar.

It was my favorite part of everything. The scar James gave me. I sighed and removed my jeans before stepping under the water.

I closed my eyes as my mind wandered back to that night. When James came home and we had some very loving, yet rough sex. I moaned as I felt myself get hard at the memory of James touching me. His strong arms gripping my shoulders as he pushed in. His hot breath on my neck. I gripped my thigh as the water ran over me, my dick pulsing hard. I moaned softly as the thought continued to grow.

I rested my back against the shower wall as my hand ran up my thigh to my rock hard cock. I slowly gripped myself, my thumb ran over the head, I hissed and threw my head back as I imagined James doing to it me. His rough hands jerking me slowly to tease me.

I stroked myself a few times, moaning James' name with each thrust.

I quickened my hand and soon I was coming, James' name leaving my lips in no more than a whisper.

I regained my composer and rubbed my eyes free of any tears.

"I miss you Jay…" I sighed.

I finished showering then dried off.

"Hurry!" I heard Logan yell though the door.

I ran gel covered fingers through my hair then rushed to my room to get dressed.

I pulled on a pair of dark wash jeans and a dark purple button up shirt.

"Ready?" Kendall asked as I emerged from my room.

"I guess." I shrugged.

"Oh here, this came in the mail." Logan handed me an envelope.

I smiled big when I saw it was from James.

"I figured now would be a good time to get it. You needed a pick-me-up." Logan smiled and leaned against Kendall as I opened the letter.

I frowned at the shortness of it, but it was still a letter from him. Meaning he was safe.

Carlos,

How are things? I firstly wanted to tell you Happy 21st birthday my love. I love you so much. I hope I can call you on your birthday. But I can't make any promises. Well I'll leave you to Kendall and Logan now, they have got a surprise for you, since I can't be there. I just wanted to tell you that I miss you and that I'm doing good. Well have a good birthday.

Love James

I sighed and looked up at my two friends.

"It wasn't very long?" Logan asked.

I shook my head. "He said he's doing good though." I stated.

"Well that's good! Let's go to dinner!" Kendall smiled.

"Okay." I smiled back.

We climbed into the car and headed to the restaurant.

I was spacing off, staring out the window, when my phone started to buzz.

"Hello?"

"Los!" James' voice called out.

"Hey Jay!" I smiled.

"Happy birthday love." James told me.

"Thanks. I miss you."

"I miss you to." I sighed. "I got your letter."

"Oh good."

"What's the surprise?" I asked.

"It's a surprise." James laughed.

"Do you know if you'll be home this year?" I asked.

"I don't think I will. I'm sorry Los." He said with a sad tone.

"Oh. Okay." I sniffed.

"Hey! Be happy on your birthday!" James stated.

"How can I when I miss my fiancé more than anything in the world?" I asked.

"I'll try to call more. I promise. Now go have a good birthday. I have to go." James paused. "I love you Carlos."

"I love you to James." I sniffed. "Bye."

"Bye." He said then the line went dead.

I placed my phone in my lap and sighed.

"You okay?" Logan asked.

"Yeah." I nodded. "Let's go have a good dinner." I smiled.

"Yay!" Kendall laughed.

We got to the restaurant and I smiled when I saw all our friends there.

Camille ran over and smiled.

"Happy birthday Carlos!" She hugged me.

"Thanks." I hugged her back.

"Carlos!" I looked to my right and saw my mom and dad.

"Mami! Papi!" I smiled and ran over to them, hugging them both.

"Happy birthday my son." My mom kissed my cheek.

I smiled and we got seated around a large table.

I looked around and noticed that the place was empty except for us.

"You rent out the entire place?" I asked my roommates.

"Yeah." Kendall nodded.

We ordered appetizers then a round of drinks.

"Presents first. Then dinner!" Logan stood and helped bring over presents.

I opened them all, receiving multiple great things from my parents and friends.

"Thank you everyone!" I smiled. "This birthday is really great."

We ordered dinner and chatted while we ate.

Soon dinner was over and we sat around, talking and catching up with each other. I stood and talked to a couple friends.

"I think you missed a present." Logan walked over.

"What? Did you not hand it to me?" I asked.

"Turn around." Kendall told me.

I turned around and felt my heart burst.

"Carlos!" I saw those hazel eyes sparkle and the face, I missed so much, light up from across the room.

I gasped as my breathing practically stopped and I sunk to my knees.

I covered my face as tears fell, hard, my sobs loud.

"Los?" I heard his fancy shoes cross the wood floor.

I looked up and smiled. James really was here, it wasn't a dream. I held out a hand and he gripped it, pulling me to my feet and into a hug.

I sobbed as he held me.

"James! I missed you so much!" I cried. I couldn't believe he was here.

"I'm home baby. I'm home." James hushed me.

"For how long this time?" I asked once we were apart. My hands still gripping his forearms, not wanting to let go.

"Forever." He stated.

"Really!" I asked.

"Really." He smiled. "I won't leave you anymore." He stated as he took my hand in his, sliding my engagement ring off my finger.

"James?"

"Carlos Garcia, I want to know if you'll still become my husband." He stated as he knelt in front of me.

I felt tears form as I nodded and he slid the ring on my finger again.

I heard cheers and woops and James hugged me tight and sealed the deal with a kiss.

"That's all I wanted." James whispered to me.

"What was?" I asked.

"To become James Garcia, to become your husband. It's what got me through these past 4 years." He told me.

I smiled and kissed him.

"You and I both."

* * *

><p>Aw did you guys like it? :) Review and tell me! Okay?<p> 


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